(A furtively insensible glance beneath the foliage:
The dawningmist caresses the stones.)

Striding hidden through (the belonging pondweed)

Climbing over a rained creek (inside a soft misty rain)

Reading in raindrops on rose-hip; (my property)

I am clear. Clearer than wellwaters megin
I am clear on what is dead with this life.

Clear. Harder than Sorrow’s first tears
Clear. Cleaner than sustenance of real gladness






Here all eyes begin

and take us from seeing

of sagacious similarities

home to the realities


Strewing you with thistles,

for that to be sieved is already dead


Taking my blue away from your eyes

A slab of meat left


Taking those mirrors of shallowness

Striking the laughter you gave


Duped remained your life

Taking you



Given you have been by the hours of light

which trickled down here through the clouds

as you were destined to among us be found,

but step by step your betrayal was nurtured


I spoke straight to the carrdrowned

where the bitterness of his grave met:


Your blanket was of a cloven glory

while Oaths gone and freely piggied

and strolled around after suckling


Now denied you cry in your sty


Eyes opening

Core falling on stone

Flower nevermore


Now the meat ends

Ripping Önd from The Path

To die right is the greatest


You have come to The Path’s end.




I have no happiness to report. Do you have any?

Sitting around and listening to garbage music in order to block away thoughts and issues so I can focus and function. (In order to block away my neighbours noise…) I guess that junk-music is my forced upon drug of choice again, for a while. Interestingly enough I have been fully aware of junk-culture for two decades now and why it works so well in this currently deranged world. It drugs down problems and takes down the ability to concentrate and leave very little time over to find and grasp reality as it is.

Escapism, as it is most commonly called, be it by reading dumb books, watching TV, or searching on the internet, playing games, talking nonsense or making useless plans, walking around in nightlife, listening to music made by morons… Whatever. It is all the same useless dead nothing inside nothingness.

These people, myself at times faking it to be included in this for observance, are in this world thinking that we cannot face any higher quality in life, or be anywhere near any higher Reality. These people are living in what seem to exist for their identities, not seeing anything other than their “peers” fully occupied with being moronic. What you will consume you will somewhat become, to others gain and amusement… And that is how it is… Well, things can only change if you change into yourself first and finally. The world around us is trapped in a grand Illusion about how “the others” are and what kind of behaviour is accepted. We can get shaped by our “peers” into copying fake and worthless identities.


Creativity… What a joke. To produce crap might be set on top of consuming crap to some. I am in doubt. No, I’m not in doubt. It is a little better to stay a passive consumer than produce junk-culture.

None of the Gods has produced more than what any human or animal can produce, semen passing on to become blood, and what we all can produce sitting in our toilets. Sadly, that is all of us, these “products”. That is the negative aspect to life down in its sad state. Then, on the positive side, we can start to try taking ourselves more seriously and see what the Gods and humanity has achieved so far. There is a tendency among many to take things for granted, but nothing is for free, you’ve heard it before, now see it in all of Life.

I really have had some serious problems in my past that stemmed from causes I was made unaware of, some of it I was a little aware of and readily avoided to confront as long as it was possible to look away from. To never stop and think as I would crash and burn, or so I thought… I felt the pain of reality as soon as I touched it. Not understanding that freedom from pain was in there to find.

A had a lie of a life for over a decade. (I had some forced upon reasons.) We all have our reasons for failing in life and these reasons must come to a point where they can’t work to hide behind. You know, I reached my peak to no good use at all around fifteen years ago and now I have nothing at all to show from that period. Now I’ve made my current life so I can have more free time on my hands, with writing this and other things you really want. Still, I would be much happier personally with living another kind of life without stress… I have always lived for others somehow. (That is one thing that I will have to change, or maybe not in this period of time… At least feeling sorry for others will never again be mistaken by me as any kind of love. That I will live for others for the rest of this life cannot really be changed; if we are speaking about my Knowledge to be spread for the good. Still, personally I do deserve more and better. I’m one of the few that actually does… Believe it or not.

I would much rather give than take. Anyway, there is nothing in this world that I really want. Nothing is good enough out there in our foes Illusion. Nor do I find the beauty I want in people that others are forcing themselves to imagine exist. I do find beauty here and there, but I will never lie to myself in order to survive, I have real things to live for… I am not really depressed either. Tired and low on energy and will at times, that is true.


Well, the mind is very simple and we can try to live on the good moments we’ve had or pick out the less good. Either way, it is not our choice to have personal opinions as Reality is set above us all and what we think does not really matter there, especially if we are to live outside this fact. I want the Knowledge first so that free will can give everyone a life in Reality. And while I’m at it I will add some real gladness to it all. I wish you the best. Most of you…





I am completely finished with my social experiments many moons ago. Sharing living now and then throughout the years with scum of the lowest imaginable order really takes a big bite on the nerves. The handpicked study material is of no real interest. Still I had to do it. Knowing fully well how “Western society” is governed and controlled with a retarded and filthy consensus that so many follow as a law… This “Western society”, or rather Anti-Western society”, is of course spread over all continents in this world with the same results in degeneration. Nobody is more sad and upset with this tragic comedy occuring around us all than me, for reasons you will know fully some day. I am really looking forward to the coming of the New Age, or New Time, as I prefer to call it.

It would be to simplify matters just to  say, as some of us do privately, that the world now  mainly is inherited with  “nerds and whores”. (Actually, I consider it insulting to all the nice nerds and the poor forced into prostitution by our foes; that are being on a higher level than what I am witnessing here and there.) We have to look at the reasons for this, the controlling behind the scenes of this perverted and retarded state of the world today. The War of all Wars.

The unaware of realities live trapped in this illusion of “normality”. It is more warped and set under control by higher, or actually lower beings, then it “normally” gets credited for. Even the majority understand that society really IS controlled, but rarely see the obvious in that they who are currently in control of most aspects in society are to blame, meanwhile pointing their filthy fingers in wrong direction, just like they are told to do…

On the low-life level there is much to be said. Retarded scum is seen as normality to copy. All high values are twisted and The Gods are said to be of the past and of no interest if there is fake religions and other mind control, junk like pop-culture and other insane stupidity to consume, etc. You have heard all this before. Add on the higher level to this and you might wake up.

It not only bores me to tears to witness this ongoing human degeneration that naturally, as always, is naming itself progression and freedom of will. This society is a complete tragedy, chained in controlled consensus. There is no “free will” for these fooled and naive “living” in their worthless scum life without any knowledge and honour. 

We witness a world being raped in front of our eyes. The attacks with brainwash aimed at women to pervert humanity as a whole and make everything into a subhuman state, through the support of controlled politics and their media, is especially haunting. Not forgetting to mention the additional actually placed and forced rapes by “spirits” all in the name of normality and free will.

It was all just about making money? Not at all. It had to do with pre-preparing another giant mass murder,  just in time before The Gods bring a New Time to rise again. 




Ever had the feeling that life at the present is a big set up, especially made to work against your will and anything good happening in your life? What if that was correct and not just a feeling? Welcome.

I could tell about my life and the different shades of negativity and darkness, the strangeness and bitterness that life brings here. Nobody outside those who know would believe it, so… Later.

I think daily about a multitude of things that I should do. I have to start making some goals here in this worthless life that surrounds me, right now.  Or later. 



I have been around the block a few times. Travelling is what you do when you have no life and wish to imagine that you are doing something with your life. I guess it is all pretty much the same everywhere in this mono-cultural world, that of course call itself multi-cultural… This upside-down-world breeds the most dumb animals, and if you think that “things just happen”, then you are one of these victims. I pity you. Let me define what culture is. Later.

I hate to travel. Carrying around stuff you need. The strain of being forced into meeting people you would prefer to see dead. The waiting for planes or buses and the smelly rides. Travelling is like eating a huge cake that taste like crap and it is full of fat that you have to work the rest of your life to get rid of. Was the sunset in that vacation spot worth it? 



To have everything and not being able or permitted to use it. Can anyone else imagine that frustration? Ah well, beauty is all our eyes need to survive another day. I tried this for a longer period: Avoiding everything that was not strikingly beautiful. Almond trees in bloom and a stunning landscape helped me with that. Not a good idea. Still, I have done a few things that I knew was less than good ideas; like trying to live like a homeless for a period some seven years ago. The list is small for these private tests on life and reality, and it does not feed my need for knowledge and insight enough. The wages are not enough. Everyone would hate me if I did not try to be more human, so there you go. Love me tender.



Things have been so slow the last two years. To think about being creative and producing is a start, but when it halts there…

I love this world, but this present illusion is not this world. I LIVE ABOVE THE ILLUSION. That is why you hate me. Love me. Later.




Think of faded traces of blood in the woods

turned into dust

in a final kiss of grey


Two footprints under the grass

Two dead at this place again


Our eyes still remain

crowned over perfection

for we kissed the lack of death

and put stone on thistle



seen in wounds


we heal